Father Refuses To Split Daughter's College Tuition With Ex-Wife, Gives Daughter Ultimatum

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  • 01
    Organism - r/AmItheAsshole Posted by u/torridpa 6 hours ago 26 24 3 2 AITA for telling my daughter I won't be paying for her college unless she attempts a relationship with my family?
  • 02
    Font - I (38M) have a 19 year old daughter Ariel with my ex-wife Lauren (39F). We had Ariel too young, and it was a huge struggle. We moved into Lauren's family's. I was working multiple jobs. Me and Lauren were best friends thru all this. But things ended when Ariel was 2. Lauren's friend Tori (38F) told me that Lauren had been messaging guys and when they went out she would give out her number. I checked Lauren's phone and found it. I asked for a divorce, Lauren was pissed and wanted to reconc
  • 03
    Font - Lauren made my life hell. Lauren badmouthed me, would miss pick up times and make decisions without talking to me. Her dad offered money to relinquish custody, I told him off. Ariel is now 19 and just started college. The deal was me and her mom would split it.
  • 04
    Font - I remarried Tori when Ariel was 6. Tori was a rock during the divorce but we didn't date till 2 years later. Lauren used this to warp Ariel against Tori and our son (13M). She excludes them. Whenever she spends the night she will just talk to me or go to her room if my family was around. Our son walks to the basement if she comes over. It hurts me a lot. I've spent thousands on therapy before people bring that up. It still is being utilized. But at this point Ariel is being nasty for the
  • 05
    Font - Ariel graduated from HS in may and hosted a party. I was invited but my family wasn't. I told Ariel I found that disrespectful. So I'd send a card but wouldn't be going. She didn't care and we haven't spoken since. I get a call from Lauren saying she paid the first semester and was wondering when I'd be paying. I said I was no longer paying. As I'm not pulling money out of my household, when Ariel is disrespectful to 2/3rds of it. My ex went off. Saying we had an agreement. I reminded her
  • 06
    Font - she planned on setting the record straight that I was done with both of them. And blocked her. I called Ariel and told her the same. Gave the reasons I'm not paying and told her she needed to look into loans. But I would pay for college if she at least tried to form a bond with my family because she created this situation with her attitude. So if she wants my help, she needs to attempt it. She started crying. But I didn't fall for it. Told her what my expectations were and to let me know
  • 07
    Font - murphy2345678. 6 hr. ago Pooperintendant [55] NTA Normally I would say Y T A but you have tried for 17 yrs and your ex ruined it. Your daughter has been old enough for a few yrs to see the truth, especially through therapy. Your ex just wanted money and now that she screwed herself since she isn't entitled to it anymore.
  • 08
    Font - Allen_1985 - 5 hr. ago edited 3 hr. Ⓒ24 22 & 66 More ΝΤΑ Everyone who is saying OP is the AH or ESH needs to get off their high horse and put themselves in his shoes. His daughter treats him like an ATM all the while disrespecting him.
  • 09
    Font - CrystalQueen3000. 6 hr. ago Commander in Cheeks [281] YTA You know what's never going to fix your family dynamic? Financial blackmail. Sometimes blended families just don't work out the way the parents want, your daughter isn't obligated to like or love your wife or your son, that doesn't mean you should respond by punishing her for it.
  • 10
    Font - Spina976 hr. ago . edited 6 hr. ago Partassipant [1] YTA, the way you are wording it, you are trying to force her to getting along with your family, do you even love your child? I mean for sure if you didnt you can just cut them off but what do you mean by you didnt "fall for it" when she started crying? Of course she would, dont drag your daughter in whatever hate you seem to have for your ex.
  • 11
    Font - claireclairey 5 hr. ago Pooperintendant [52] 93 YTA. Not for not paying your part of the agreement, but for springing this on them NOW, so late in the game. Forms for college grants and loans are due in winter for the following year. It is now almost September (when classes start), and tuition is due. You waited until the very last minute to give your daughter ultimatums, and now, when she's got nowhere else to turn, you threaten her entire college year. That is manipulative, exploitative
  • 12
    Font - rainbow_mak3r 6 hr. ago Honestly I think you should send this post to your daughter. Does she even know what her mother did? She cheated on you. And then she turned your daughter against you. You should give her one last chance and tell her that all of this is the truth. That her mother is the one that turned her against you and see what she does.

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